I'm a screenwriter/producer trying to maintain a relationship, decent career and two cats, all while fighting off the living dead.
IMPORTANT VIDEO - FOR LOVERS OF HAPPINESS ONLY!
"Congratulations, you're still in the running toward becoming America's Next Top Model." - Tyrannosaurus Banks, Host and Executive Producer - AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL
"I don't want no white man looking at my Tampax!" Jean Hill as "Grizelda" in DESPERATE LIVING
"I'm running a circus, not a charm school..." Joan Crawford in BEZERK!
"I'm gonna get me a shotgun and kill all the whiteys I see..." Garrett Morris (sung), SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE
"Giving someone a piece of art is just forcing your taste on them. It's as bad as giving someone a book..." An ex of mine, after I gave him a poster
"I love that story." Pee-Wee Herman, PEE-WEE'S BIG ADVENTURE
"I'd probably be famous now if I wasn't such a good waitress." Jane Siberry (sung), "The Waitress" from NO BORDERS HERE
"Prepare for a pride-obliterating bitch slap." Mooninite, AQUA TEEN HUNGER FORCE
"I have had enough of your sassy mouth!" Mojo Jojo, POWERPUFF GIRLS
"Paul (bearpawly) is like eating calf brains - Curiousity gets the best of you and you try it, then realize you never have to do it again. And then you forever have a great story to turn people's stomachs at dinner parties." Pretty much everybody, THE PEOPLE
"Everything is the worst!" Liz Lemon (Tina Fey), 30 ROCK